Part 4 - Men's Mental Health Series - Building Strong Connections for Better Mental Health

Ever wondered what it truly takes to break the barriers around men's mental health? Join us in the final chapter of our transformative four-part series, where we promise you'll gain the tools and insights to foster a supportive environment for yourself and those you care about. We revisit our journey from dismantling stigmas and understanding anxiety and depression to harnessing resilience and effective coping strategies. Today, we focus on the crucial role of open communication and professional help in building a robust support network. Learn how prioritizing mental well-being can enhance your roles as husbands, fathers, and leaders in your community.

Discover the profound impact of men's support groups in creating spaces of emotional safety, where vulnerability and personal growth are encouraged. Hear Alex's inspiring story—a successful business owner who turned his life around by embracing therapy and a support group. This episode underscores the importance of finding your tribe and supporting one another with empathy and compassion. We champion the call to break mental health stigmas and build resilient, thriving communities. Join the brotherhood of the Awakened Man to live with passion, purpose, and power, and spread these crucial messages to uplift others.

Key moments in this episode:

00:12 Episode 1: Tackling Stigma - https://youtu.be/KF-pqzhN9YQ
00:41 Episode 2: Managing Anxiety and Depression - https://youtu.be/0cH4aYMqHTU
01:11 Episode 3: Building Resilience - https://youtu.be/OwujAehD3aU
01:36 Today's Focus: Fostering a Supportive Environment
02:05 Building a Support Network
04:26 Open Communication: The Key to Support
07:08 Mutual Support and Compassionate Accountability
10:42 The Power of Men's Groups
14:24 Combining Professional Help and Community Support
18:07 Conclusion and Key Takeaways

Chapters

• 0:00 Men's Mental Health Support Network
• 12:28 Building Resilience Through Men's Support
• 20:18 Creating Supportive Environments for Men

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Hello and welcome back to the final episode of this four-part series on men's mental health. And before we get into that, let's do a bit of a refresh on where we've come from to get us to where we are today. And so, in episode one, we tackled the stigma surrounding men's mental health, and in that we discussed how societal norms and fears of judgment have often prevented us from addressing our mental health issues, and we emphasize that acknowledging struggles and seeking help is a sign of strength and not weakness, and breaking the stigma is essential for us in promoting open conversations about mental health and encouraging us men to seek the support that we are going to need. In the second episode, we focused on recognizing and managing anxiety and depression. We identified that there are common symptoms of these two, of anxiety and depression. We discussed how these conditions can manifest differently in men and provided some practical strategies for managing these challenges, and so understanding anxiety and depression is going to be a crucial part in maintaining our mental well-being, and so we shared the importance of seeking professional help and how we address those issues. And then, in the third episode, we explored building resilience and developing healthy coping mechanisms. We defined resilience and we discussed how it can be developed over time. We shared various healthy coping mechanisms, and we included mindfulness, physical activity and strong social connections, and so building resilience can really help us manage our stress and improve our overall mental health.

Speaker 1: 1:36

But today we're going to be discussing the crucial aspect of mental health, and that's fostering a supportive environment as we seek help, and so having a supportive environment and seeking professional help is going to be very key in components in helping us really maintain good mental health, and so in this episode, I'm going to touch on how to build that support network, get the benefits of seeking help, and how to encourage you to prioritize your mental health.

Speaker 1: 2:05

So let's dive in today's discussion and learn how we can create and sustain a supportive environment for our mental well-being. Let's face it inevitably there will come a time in our life when you will hit a wall, whether it's a marriage that's not working, a career or a business that has stagnated, or maybe your personal life is just flatlined, and so if you're tired and fed up with where your life is at, I'm going to want you to get clear about who you are, about where you are and what you are meant to be. Then I encourage you to truly start your hero's quest to where you can become more, accomplish more and live more than ever before. Go to memberstheawakenedmannet and start your quest today, and with that, let's get on with today's episode.

Speaker 2: 2:56

The average man today is sleepwalking through life, many never reaching their true potential, let alone ever crossing the finish line to living a purposeful life. Yet the hunger still exists, albeit buried amidst his cluttered mind, misguided beliefs and values that no longer serve him. It's time to align yourself for greatness. It's time to become a revolutionary man. Stay strong, my brother.

Speaker 1: 3:25

Welcome everyone to the Revolutionary man podcast. I'm the founder of the Awakened man Movement and your host, alan DeMonso. Let me start by asking you a couple of questions. Who do you turn to when you need support and how does that support system impact your mental health? Because I want you to reflect on these relationships, because they can help us understand the importance and how they contribute to our well-being. So the next question, or the second question I have for you is have you ever hesitated in seeking help, whether that be professionally or in a different environment? What were your reasons for doing that and how did you overcome them? Overcome them. You see how, when we become aware and can understand the barriers, they can help us to really take the necessary steps that we need in seeking help. And so I want to dive deep into the importance of building a strong supportive network today and how we can significantly enhance our well-being and truly be the husbands and fathers and leaders that we're meant to be. So let's start with building a supportive network. You know a strong network is going to be crucial for our mental health. It provides us that emotional support and a sense of belonging, and it's also practical assistance during really challenging times Because think about it when the chips are down, do we have that go-to guy or guys that we can reach out to? You know, for men who often feel the pressure of having to handle our problems alone and there's many of us who do that if we don't have a reliable support system, it's going to make a world of difference if we can build one around us.

Speaker 1: 4:57

And so how do we do that? Well, it starts by having some open communication, and I know this is a real big challenge for many of us. And so let's just start with the first idea of an open communication. How about with yourself? Can you be honest with yourself about your feelings and your needs? And I'm not talking about these touchy-feely feelings and not really being involved in it. What I'm saying is having the self-awareness and really being able to address the first step if you're having mental health issues and when we can really understand where we're coming through. To name it, as I had one podcast guest say, you name it to tame it, you feel it, to heal it, to reveal it, and it's a great and powerful message for us to do.

Speaker 1: 5:43

We also have to have open communication with our loved ones. We have to foster that open and honest communication with our family by letting them in when we're struggling and we need support. I'm going to say something here that might be a bit controversial, and that is it's not the first place that I recommend men go to, especially if this is something you haven't done in the past, because, believe it or not, the people that count on us rely on us, our family, our spouses. They may not be able to handle or deal with us coming forward when we start bringing forward mental health challenges, the things that we're struggling with. So I really recommend you being able to get that practice and that skill developed with other men. When we share our feelings and we sit in a circle with other men, we can be encouraged by seeing others do it, and so then we can do the same and we can learn how to create that safe space for us so we can have some mutual understanding and support. And when that happens, then we're better prepared to speak to our family and the close people in our lives. And, of course, the third place in having open communication is with people that we trust. We must practice and develop a group of individuals, a tribe, so to speak that allows us the ability to be able to speak what's in our heart, and so choose your friends wisely, find mentors and or colleagues to help us really talk about and share our experiences without any fear or judgment and that's a really important piece and then have regular check-ins with these people. You know, our relationships grow when we lean into them, and if we're the type of person and I'll raise my hand here where that can be a challenge and we're not reaching out to our close friends, then it's difficult when we do do that, because they're not used to having us be in a space where they are hearing and sensing what it is that's on our plate, and so have regular check-ins.

Speaker 1: 7:40

What's the other thing we have to consider in building these communities is what we need to be in a community where there's mutual support. See, not only do we have to be there for ourselves, but we need to also be there for others. You know, as we offer support and encouragement to our friends and our family during their difficult times, we become that person that is trustworthy, and so we have to learn and practice to be a good listener and show empathy in all of these things can help us really strengthen our relationships. And so remember that mutual or mutual support is really a two-way street, you know it's. We need to be there for others in order for them to be there for ourselves.

Speaker 1: 8:19

And the other piece that I think is really key, especially in my men's work here, is having compassionate accountability. So what do I mean by compassionate accountability? It's about really gently holding each other accountable for our self-care, our healthy behaviors, the things that we say that we're going to do, because far too often do we get involved in any types of groups where there isn't any form of accountability. And I'm not talking about accountability where it's balls to the wall type of stuff. I'm talking about being able to be there for your brother and to say hey, man, what's happening for you? Why isn't it that you haven't been able to accomplish what you wanted to accomplish? What is holding you back? Is there a fear there? Is there something that we can support you in? You see, we're not letting each other off the hook, so to speak. What we're doing is letting them know that, no matter what they're going through, we may not fully understand, but we're here to support you. You know, it really involves encouraging folks. It's creating that space, a container for us to be able to speak what's on our mind and know that we're not going to be judged or shamed for how we're feeling.

Speaker 1: 9:28

You know, a third aspect really of building a supportive community and environment is we need to find that quality time and I just want to make sure that we're clear on quality time doesn't mean quantity of time. You know, when we spend quality time, it's really about prioritizing the most important relationships in our lives, because when we do that, what we're saying to those people and to ourselves is that you matter and that I matter, and so we want to engage in activities that we can enjoy, we can foster strong bonds together. Of course, these activities can be a lot of different things. If you're in a relationship, setting up scheduled date nights and while that may sound a bit mechanical, trust me, the moment that you start making time within your calendar to spend time with those key people in your life, the relationship gets much, much stronger. So consider how it is that you can improve the quality time of the people you care about the most, and then I want you to engage in activities that really strengthen your the most, and then I want you to engage in really activities that really strengthen your other relationships and I already talked a little bit about whether that's date nights with your spouse or getting involved in some sort of sports or a hobby, something that you may enjoy doing, doing volunteer work. One of the things that's really important to me is working with the homeless and working in soup kitchens and other things in the area, because it really resonates to me is working with the homeless and from working in soup kitchens and and other things in the area, because it really resonates with me, because I truly believe that any one of us you know are one one accident away from being in that position in life, and so really create and find supportive communities like that to help you strengthen your idea of what community is all about, and it brings you a lot of pleasure and satisfaction.

Speaker 1: 11:12

So I want to talk about throughout this whole series you know I've been dropping hints that there's a great amount of power in joining a men's group, and the reason I say that is because for many of us men, we don't have a place that we can go. We don't have that community, that band of brothers as we call our group, where we can share about the things that are important in our lives, to talk about truly what's at stake in our lives, so that we can become better fathers, husbands and leaders. And while these groups are not just always about speaking or being intellectual, they're groups that spend time, that are very experiential. Key is about finding the type of group that really fits with you, and so I just want to give you a few ideas of some of the benefits that I've found from joining men's groups and running them. And so the first thing is really about the shared experience, and isn't that what we've talked about through this four-part series? It's about men being allowed to share our experience, our challenges, openly. It's about hearing other people's stories so we can normalize our own struggles, because sometimes we get it in our head that we think we're the only one that's going through this and our story is so much worse, and so when we do that, we can get feelings of isolation.

Speaker 1: 12:28

When you get into a group and you have some shared experience, we recognize that many of us are on the same path and struggle with very similar things. We also need emotional support, you know, for many of us men, we've been told or been brought up to believe that we shouldn't be showing any emotion, and while in men's groups, there are the occasion where it can be extremely emotional. What I'm recommending here, suggesting here is it's an opportunity for us to allow ourselves to be vulnerable enough to get real, to get raw about the shit that's bothering us or the parts of our hearts that are breaking, and can we be there in that place to know that we're not judged. And so I think it's important that when we are able to really express our emotions and we may not be great with it at first, but in order to become better, we must practice releasing our emotions to allow us to get to a place that we can have the right amount of emotion. You know and it's also about being in a group, as I said earlier, about compassion and accountability In order to really emphasize personal growth, we need to be consistent with how we're showing up, and so that's what a men's group can do Members can hold each other accountable by making positive changes as we produce or pursue our goals.

Speaker 1: 13:48

And so, you know, each group is going to be a slightly different. Some are going to be a little bit more on the accountability scale. We tend to operate on a compassionate accountability because we really want to encourage men to get to that level where they no longer need us to be accountable for it, to that they are accountable for themselves because they're living with something and living through life of believing something much greater than them. And it's also opportunity. Obviously, if we're doing those first three, we're building skills. We're building skills to give us an opportunity to show up better, so that we can be more effective in our communication, so we can manage stress much more effectively, so that we can really develop healthy coping strategies.

Speaker 1: 14:32

All of that happens because you join a men's group. You get an opportunity to be surrounded with other men who are going through something similar to you or have been through it, and they get to be that mentor for yourself. So this is why I get so excited about doing men's work mentor for yourself. So this is why I get so excited about doing men's work. It's an opportunity for us to. It's a way for us to help men who are on the path of personal development, looking to be the best that they can be.

Speaker 1: 14:56

It doesn't mean that doing men's work alone is the only path, because, depending on where you're at, professional help may be required, and so there's great benefit in doing a bit of both having professional help as you truly need it, and then there's a community environment to help fill in that void, that piece that you'll need. And so, of course, there's therapy and counseling that you can do with one-on-one sessions, the support groups like we offer here with the Band of Brothers, and there's so many online resources today for men's personal development that can help you get through any particular aspect of your life. And so many men may hesitate to seek help because they still have that stigma. They still have a fear of judgment or a belief that if we can't handle our problems on our own, then who are we? But it's important that we recognize, through this four-part series, that in order to break these barriers, we need to be proactive and lean into our skills and abilities and really start to practice and hone them.

Speaker 1: 15:59

And so let me tell you a little story about my friend, alex, who sought help for his mental health, for the positive changes that it's brought in his life. And so Alex is a successful business owner, and he struggled with severe anxiety and depression For years. He avoided seeking help because he feared it would make him weak, and so his turning point came when his wife encouraged him to see a therapist, and so at first he was reluctant, but he decided to go try it, and through therapy he learned to understand that his anxiety and development strategies manage, that he was joined a support group where he found solace in sharing his experience and development strategies manage, that he was joined a support group where he found solace in sharing his experience and with others who understood his struggles. So the support Alex received from his therapist and a supportive group of men was truly transformative. He felt less isolated, more empowered to handle his mental health challenges, and so his relationship improved, and he became a vocal advocate for mental health awareness, and so he's been encouraging others to seek help and do the same.

Speaker 1: 16:57

So Alex's story really highlights a profound impact of seeking professional help while having a strong support group or system, and so it's a reminder that, as we ask for help, it's a sign of strength, not a sign of weakness. So I'm going to encourage you to look for and find your community, your tribe, where you have an opportunity to be around other men who can help you get through the toughest times of your life, and so, as we do that, I want you to think of you being the other guy, that guy who's being approached by, maybe a family member or a friend who's looking for help, and so how can you be there and be supportive for them? And so I'm going to encourage you to really approach these folks with empathy Because consider approaching our family friend who may be struggling with empathy and really understanding that you're there to support them. We're not trying to fix anything. We just wanted to be there and support them, as they need to be supported. We can provide them information, we can put them towards a therapy or counseling that may need, or maybe even a men's group. The biggest thing here is we just want to make sure that we're there to hear them, to listen to what they have to say, and so, when we are providing feedback and commentary to it, that we're not minimizing what they're trying to say or, even worse yet, we're trying to say I understand what that's like and you don't have a clue what it's about, or you make it sound more than what it truly is, and so it takes practice, it takes time and it takes opportunity to be involved with other men to experience the challenges that they're going through. So, as I talked about, there's lots of different ways that you can get support and help.

Speaker 1: 18:40

And, as I think about this series, there's some key takeaways I want to make sure that we wrap up this whole series with. And so, when I think back to episode one, I think about the importance of breaking that stigma and surrounding men's mental health right. So we need to acknowledge it's okay to struggle and seeking help is a sign of strength and not weakness. In episode two, we talk about managing anxiety and depression. So really understanding the symptoms and seeking help can really improve our mental well-being. So take and make use of those practices that we talked about in that episode. Really take opportunity to recognize that these are conditions that we can manage instead of ignoring them. And then, in episode three, we really built on that and talked about building resilience and creating healthy coping mechanisms. So resilience is like a muscle the more that we practice it, the more we're able to adapt to adversities. It comes back to us and it's really about the bounce back ability for us, and so we need to incorporate healthy habits. We talked at that time about mindfulness and physical activity and really having some strong social connections.

Speaker 1: 19:48

And then today we emphasize the significance of finding and fostering a supportive environment for yourself as you seek help, and so surround yourself with supportive people and be willing to seek professional help.

Speaker 1: 20:00

That is a crucial step, because not always will a men's group help you do that, and I truly believe that there's a great power in the combination of those two men's group as well as professional therapy.

Speaker 1: 20:18

And so have some open communication, find and build some mutual support, use the quality time with loved ones to help you get through these times of dark times for us, and then you'll be able to foster supportive network. So remember that when we do all of this, it's really for not only our own well-being, but the well-being of our family and the communities that we're in. So I want to thank you for following me on this journey, you know, and together we can break the stigma, manage our own mental health, build resilience and create supportive environments. And just want you to know, gentlemen, that we are all in this together, striving to be the best version of ourselves. And so, as we close today, I just want to remind you to do hit subscribe, to leave a review and to share this podcast so others may benefit from it as well. And so until next time, my friends, live with passion, purpose and power.

Speaker 2: 21:17

Thank you for listening to the Revolutionary man podcast. Are you ready to own your destiny, to become more the man you are destined to be? Join the brotherhood that is the Awakened man at theawakendmannet and start forging a new destiny today.