From Military Struggles to Ultra Marathon Triumphs with Marty Cornish

What if overcoming adversity wasn't just about surviving, but about thriving and finding purpose? Join us in a compelling episode featuring Marty Cornish, an inspiring entrepreneur, athlete, and mental health advocate. Marty shares his journey from a challenging upbringing with a single mother and a stepfather battling addiction to achieving milestones in military service, ultramarathons, and successful business ventures. His story is a testament to the power of resilience and the human spirit's relentless pursuit of greatness.

How do societal expectations shape our mental health and personal growth? Together, Marty and I explore the complex impact of mental health on men's lives across generations, revealing the often unseen struggles and the importance of aligning with core values. We discuss actionable strategies for maintaining mental well-being and the vital role of resilience, especially forged through military experiences. Marty's insights and personal anecdotes shed light on how facing life's challenges head-on can lead to profound personal growth and fulfilment.

Can embracing stoic principles transform your life? We wrap up by delving into powerful stories of friendship, resilience, and the transformative journey of self-discovery. From a near-fight on the rugby field to the bonds forged through shared adversity, Marty underscores the importance of trustworthy support systems and the lessons from Ryan Holiday's "The Obstacle is the Way." This episode is a call to action for anyone looking to build a purposeful and fulfilling life, inviting you to join the brotherhood of the Awakened Man and start forging your new destiny.

Key moments in this episode:
04:18 Marty's Early Life and Challenges
07:07 Shifting Mindsets and Overcoming Self-Doubt
12:12 The Importance of Core Values
14:21 Military Service and Building Resilience
18:16 Mental Health and Breaking the Silence
22:22 The Role of Mentors and Overcoming Adversity
34:19 Phoenix Workwear and Personal Mission
40:32 Final Thoughts and Takeaways

How to reach Marty:
🕸 https://phxriseabove.com/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/Made.Status
IG: https://www.instagram.com/marty_madestatus/
📺: https://www.youtube.com/@Martycornish
X: https://twitter.com/Martycornish007
In: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marty-cornish/

Chapters

• 0:00 Navigating Resilience and Mental Health
• 9:23 Building Resilience and Authentic Manhood
• 20:23 Discovering Core Values and Self-Validation
• 32:04 Navigating Adversity and Personal Growth
• 43:23 Embracing Masculine Destiny

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Today we have an episode that promises to inspire and challenge your perceptions. So imagine growing up in a world where mental health is rarely discussed, where strength is measured by physical feats and silent endurance. You know, this is the life many men and so many of us today feel that we live. But today we're going to dive into these themes of mental health, the resilience forged through the military service and the relentless pursuit of ultra-marathon achievements. We're going to explore how these experiences intertwine and inspire a movement to break the silence around the mental well-being. So I want you to stay with us as we unpack a compelling story of triumph, advocacy and the relentless pursuit of the human spirit, and this will be the backdrop against which all of our discussion today is going to unfold.

Speaker 1: 0:51

Before we get into that in today's episode, let's come to grips here about one thing, and that it is inevitable there will come a time in our life when we will hit a wall, and whether it's a marriage that's not working, a career or business that's stagnated, or your personal life has just flatlined. So if you're tired and fed up with where life is at, I'm going to want you to be clear about a few things about who you are about where you are and about what you are meant to be. And when you're ready to do that, I'm going to encourage you to start your hero's quest. It's where you can become more, accomplish more and live more than ever before. Just go to memberstheawakenedmannet. Let's start your quest today and with that, let's get on with today's episode.

Speaker 2: 1:38

The average man today is sleepwalking through life, many never reaching their true potential, let alone ever crossing the finish line to living a purposeful life. Yet the hunger still exists, albeit buried amidst his cluttered mind, misguided beliefs and values that no longer serve him. It's time to align yourself for greatness. It's time to become a revolutionary man. Stay strong, my brother you to consider this.

Speaker 1: 2:09

How have societal attitudes and personal experiences shaped your approach to mental well-being? Then I want you to consider the role of resilience in your life. How have your challenges and achievements shaped your ability to overcome adversity? Every day, we have an opportunity to reveal a little bit more about who we are as men. The character that we show ourselves in the world ranges from moments of power and strength to moments of anguish and despair. The question is, what are you doing at both ends of those spectrum? Are you honing and developing your skills that improve your life? Are you struggling to find a way forward? Regardless of where you're at in your journey, I just want you to strap yourself in as my guest and I venture into the waters of resilience, fortitude and service. And so allow me to introduce my guest.

Speaker 1: 3:12

Marty Cornish is a dynamic entrepreneur, an athlete and a mental well-being advocate. His diverse background in the military service, ultramarathons and business epitomizes resilience and determination, and he's been recognized by Facebook's APAC as one of the top 1% marketers and media buyers. And so Marty has scaled brands to over 70,000 customers across 31 countries, and so it is because of these experiences that Marty has a profound understanding of what truly means to be resilient, to persevere and the power of overcoming adversity. So welcome to the show, marty. How are things, brother?

Speaker 1: 3:51

Awesome brother, Alan, thank you for having me man, man, I'm so excited. I really liked when you reached out and I was doing some research about today's interview and I just really like the work that you're doing, guys here at the Revolutionary man podcast. The very first question I ask all my guests is to talk a little bit about your hero's quest. So tell us about that time in your life when you knew things had to change. What did you do about it and how has that experience shaped you and the man you are today and the work you're doing?

Speaker 3: 4:19

Yeah, I guess we've got to go back to the start. My mom had me at 16. My dad didn't stick around, but this really shaped my drive and ambition to try and create a better life. I watched my mum struggle. She's my best friend to this day, because people often ask me how am I so ambitious? And it was because of that I had to step up and be the man. And it was hard for me because I wasn't able to provide for my mum because I was so young. But it fueled me because, like, all I wanted was some kind of normal life, and what I mean by that is having lots of food in the cupboard or having a nice house that felt like a home with furniture.

Speaker 3: 5:03

And you know, my stepfather at the time was, you know, in into drugs and heavy drugs, so he would pawn a lot of my stuff. So I don't I never use that for sympathy because without those experiences it wouldn't have given me the drive to try and become somebody. So my hero's journey really started then. But there's been lots of self-doubt where I'm like I'm not smart enough to really get a degree. I wasn't really good at school, I was good at sport. So there's this massive self-doubt about how am I ever actually going to build this if I'm not really good at school. From my point of view, successful people had degrees. They were dentists, doctors, lawyers. There's been a lot in my hero's journey.

Speaker 1: 5:49

It's something I'm definitely love talking about man, you just dropped a ton of bombs there. Marty, just love that feverishly making notes here. Just just to start off by talking about not having that real father figure in your life. And I talked about in the intro how these things that are part of our life and happen, how we shape them and what we do with them, really is a forebore of how our life is going to be, and so you chose to see that not as something as a fault or something that held you back, but to propel you forward.

Speaker 1: 6:26

And the other notes I was making down here was just your the idea of how you thought the your image of what success means. Is that success means having a degree or going to school, being smart enough, and that really resonated with me, because when I was in school, I can, my my passion was cooking, and so that's what I wanted to do, but I didn't. But I also felt that I just wasn't smart enough to do anything else. Could I be an accountant or a lawyer or anything else? And so I didn't. I really discounted that. Now I had a successful career as a chef, but it really resonates with me about how we make these stories up, and so tell me a little bit about how you started to shift that those stories, into doing what you're doing today.

Speaker 3: 7:15

Yeah, sorry, but just on your point there, it's a really good point. We don't even give ourselves an opportunity. We already have this story in our head that we've made up, that I'm never going to be good at school or I'm never going to be this Fair enough. I wasn't that passionate about it at the time but, like you're saying, with the cooking, we didn't even give ourselves some kind of self-confidence or belief that we could actually do it. So how did these stories? Sorry, what was the question? Sorry with with your point? So with, how did these stories really propel me?

Speaker 1: 7:46

yeah, you talked about how you had shaped these. Looking at, hey, I'm not good, I'm not smart enough, so I may, I won't be successful that you've proven that to be different. So I was just wanting to take you back to those early days and what were some of the things that you were doing and how are you changing your mindset to prove otherwise.

Speaker 3: 8:06

Yeah, that's a great question. So I got a role model. I got somebody that had gone through something very similar to me. This person grew up without a father. This person defied all the odds. This person didn't go to university but had built and had defied those odds. So there was still a lot of self-doubt for me in that time, but I was given some kind of hope that maybe, just maybe, there is some kind of shot here for me to do it. It was hope and that's all I needed was a little bit of hope that I could actually do it, that it was possible potentially.

Speaker 1: 8:49

That's so fortunate that you were able to find that mentor and that piece, and a little bit later in the show, I'll ask you a couple of questions on the mentor side of the business, of what you're doing, but I think that is so important as a young man especially as a young man who's having facing the challenges you were faced to have mentors somewhere to somebody to help guide us, to take us through, and I think that's the big difference between having a coach, who somebody, is more directive, whereas mentors are really leading you the way and guiding you and giving you that opportunity to make decisions, but they're there to support you. And so part of your work, though, also is with mental health, and it's because it's rarely discussed and we just finished coming- out here in june with men's mental health month and and doing a series of podcasts on.

Speaker 1: 9:35

I wanted to get your thoughts on it. So how it's? How has mental health affected your understanding as, especially as a child and now as an adult?

Speaker 3: 9:47

yeah, looking back on my childhood, like I, because I ended up going to live with my grandfather who served 14 years in the military. So I ended up, was fortunate to live with him because he's an amazing man, one of principle and being. He's a very man of your word, very integrity. So but I said to him the other day because we've just started to partner with a new men's it's called brothers and books, a new charity we're partnering with and I said to him I said to, what are your thoughts on mental health? And he still goes, won't really believe in it. He believes in being resilient, that if you've got a problem you get on with it. You don't it, you've got to take accountability. But he doesn't word it like that.

Speaker 3: 10:29

And this guy's a really nice, loyal, dependable guy. But his father was very tough. These guys were built on the farm, these guys got on with the job. So the conversation from my childhood was it was never discussed, it just wasn't something we'd ever talked about. And then now when I have that conversation with him, it's still not something that's really but I'm. When I see him next, I really want to understand more around his beliefs, where he but I.

Speaker 1: 10:59

My assumption is it's generational yeah, that would make that make. It makes a lot of sense, especially as I think back to where my father was and how his father like he, my dad was one of 15 children and he was in the middle, and so the this, the sheer toughness that they would have had for sure, was suck it up buttercup, so to to speak.

Speaker 1: 11:24

And there was an opportunity for you to show weakness because there was just too much to do. And I say that on purpose, because I think, unfortunately for many of us men, when it comes to days that we're challenged, the days that are not as when we're not at our best, is that we do think of it. That was what we're being weak, but we're truly not being weak. And so let's talk a little bit about what your thoughts on that and how and how you're dealing with that aspect in your life and the life of the men that you're helping yeah, I can relate, I feel like as men.

Speaker 3: 11:59

Obviously, if we've got society telling us what they think we should be and what we shouldn't be, there's a lot of expectation. And then if we're ambitious men or men that want more, then there's even more pressure. I believe, and I don't think it's easy, but I really feel for me it comes back to knowing my core values, knowing who I want to be, and really coming back to my controlling, the control, really getting stuck into that core and going okay with everything that's going on that I'm facing. Are these things in my control or out of my control? If they're in my control, then I need to come up with a strategy and a game plan to reduce overwhelm, to start taking action, because I know that makes me feel better when I'm making progress. The biggest thing I've learned is or not the biggest thing I've learned. But one of the things to help with this is, at the end of the day, just finding three simple things that have progressed you, so that way you're not going to bed going, oh shit, I'm not making any progress, because that's how I feel I feel all the time, but then, if you actually look for the wins in the day.

Speaker 3: 13:19

Did you get your workout in? I was on a podcast and had a great conversation. These are all steps of me becoming the man I want to be. I didn't drink alcohol. I didn't go party. I'm staying true to myself. I'm showing up for my family. These are all wins that we need to celebrate.

Speaker 1: 13:38

Completely agree and what I really appreciate about what you're saying there and we spend a lot of time in our work here with with our men's group it's called the band of brothers and we spend a lot of time talking about truly understanding what our core values are and then, living by them and really making sure that what we have said are our values, that we are actually living them and embodying them.

Speaker 1: 14:01

Because what I've found is that when we get ourselves in trouble as men, is that we're out of alignment between what we say we value and what our actions are showing, and so I really appreciate that you brought that up, and I also like how you talked about really about you know developing a strategy and game plan, and so let's move a little bit over into your military service and get help us understand how you've used a lot, utilize that service time to help you build resilience and mental toughness yeah, there's with the training that we do like when I was in the jungles of malaysia and it's just so hot and you're carrying, and I was carrying the big machine gun and all the ammunition and we're going out there for four or five days at a time and it was just wet there's.

Speaker 3: 14:47

You try and go to sleep at night and your socks are wet, everything's wet. There's just leeches sucking on you in the middle. And the training that we did there it was some of the toughest training I've done and you can't show, you can't be the weakest link in your platoon or your section. You can't let the other man down like you might be carrying all these. If you're on the machine gun and you're, if you're, if your section or platoon gets into a fight, you're like their protection to provide cover.

Speaker 3: 15:22

So if you're not got your fitness and if you're falling behind in the jungles and you're too I'm going to use the word weak because you haven't put in the time to build your fitness you're going to potentially let your men down, your band of brothers down. Yeah, so, learning to push when the mind says look, no, I can't do it. Learning to push past that event, actually achieving it. You realize that the mind puts these self-limiting beliefs and what we think we can do and that applied into my marathon running and that's what I learned. The mind will sometimes place these limits on us, but in fact they're actually not real.

Speaker 1: 16:11

That makes so much sense, and I think that is what happens to us. And then one of the topics that we're talking about this month in our group is dealing with the seven messengers of fear, and so let's talk a little bit about that, because that's what I think that you're really getting at is that we have these mental limits, but it's really from a basis of fear, and so what do you think is causing us to be fearful in these instances?

Speaker 3: 16:38

A lack of self-confidence, fear of what other people think of us. These are the big ones. It's not knowing who we are and what our core values are. It comes back to our core values. Once we know who we are, what we stand for, what we believe, then what other people think of us doesn't really matter. Yeah, you know what I mean.

Speaker 3: 17:04

Yeah, go ahead Because it's like this person might disagree with me or they might not like what I'm about, but I know my values are integrity and persistence, so I'm trying to be a better man. So it's really a relative. Obviously we want to get along with people. We're not coming out just being this asshole. But when the naysayers come and that's where, like guys like elon musk and I know a lot of people love him or hate him, but he is who he is, kanye west is, he is who he is and I admire those qualities about them. I'm not saying I like everything they do, but I'm just using as an example I would completely agree with you.

Speaker 1: 17:42

I think the you know the names that you've mentioned are is that there's at least a persona, is there's no black and white. It's not like there's a hidden agenda. They're authentic, whether we like it or not. That's our own opinions on it, but they're being authentic and I think, looking at the work that you're doing and some of the work with with the Phoenix workwear, isn't that part of the model of what it is that you're really helping to do, as well as providing some support for some military folks, but really it's about helping men really live authentic lives.

Speaker 3: 18:15

Yeah, and the work that I'm really starting to uncover that I'm passionate about is because I'm also a partner in another business with a former Olympian and world champion boxer, Michael Casitas, and I'm also a partner in another business with a former Olympian and champion world champion boxer, Michael Casitas, and I'm helping. We're working on like a resilience course at the moment and I've really been doing a lot of research with the boxers and the men that want to work and a lot of it comes back to it's not actually to become better boxers. It's actually about how you come back from a loss, the self-confidence to come back and fight again and not let that loss in your head dictate your career path and trajectory, which I found really fascinating. It's actually not the boxing these guys want. It's the mindset of how I come back from a loss or how I deal with the nerves before I come out into the ring and the self-doubt.

Speaker 1: 19:10

Absolutely. And so some of that work, obviously using some of the training and the experience you had from your military service and also through your ultramarathon. Now you mentioned it briefly earlier, so tell us a little bit about how did you go from military service doing ultramarathons and how has that shaped and changed? Shaped you into what you're doing and changed some of your philosophy about life?

Speaker 3: 19:33

yeah, I was running this company, zero to 70 000 customers, caught up in my ego, traveling the world, drinking girls, all that stuff not heaps of girls, but just single guys, just living that life, and we're going through quite a bit of adversity at the time and we're just growing so quickly and with that just comes a lot of, I guess, pressure and and I was drinking on the weekends to go to have, so work really hard and then go drink on the weekends and blow off steam, not every weekend. But and I was just going for a bit of a rough patch and I'm like I I need to find my best again. I need something that's gonna call my at my best. And I was heading over to la again and it was my 30th birthday and I thought I'm gonna run a marathon for my birthday. That's's what will be my 30th. Mind you, it was four weeks until I was going to LA and just the chances were that the LA marathon was actually on when I was going to be in LA. But then when I converted the distance from miles to kilometers and I was like oh Lord, a marathon is actually 42 kilometers. I thought it was around. This is how naive I was. I thought it was around. This is how naive I was. I thought it was like maybe a 15K thing, right. So I didn't end up running the marathon that year. I'd ended up not doing it.

Speaker 3: 20:52

But then I started training for my half marathon. I ran a 10K, then I ran my first half marathon and then I just fell in love with the and I actually got very emotional on that race because there was a moment where we'll come. My first half marathon was in Brisbane and I remember running and the city was, the sunrise was coming and I got this euphoric feeling that you get. It's very rare, but it was just over my body and it was because of what I'd overcome.

Speaker 3: 21:26

I was just in such a dark low point at that time and I had no one to speak to because I always thought that real men suffer in silence. That's what I always said to myself. So I never tell the soul. I never wanted to be weak because I was always the tough guy. I. I was the guy that boxed. I was the guy that when people getting bullied, they would come to me. But that half marathon I remember it was just that because of those low points I was going through about six weeks beforehand. So then I actually I never I was good at running and I liked it but I wasn't in love with it. But I love the training for the races because it forced me to be my best.

Speaker 1: 22:11

I just love that and I just what. I really appreciate what you just said there as you talked about. But it was an opportunity. You were always the tough guy and we had to suffer in silence and so many of us as men do that, don't we? We feel that we can't show any weakness and so we do suffer in silence and because we choose to do that, it shows up in many different ways and for some of us it's still be an addiction of some sort. Others will have it show up as health issues, physical issues, and so you talked about the training in the ultra marathon is really the part that that you fell in love with. But I want to really spend a little bit of time about this idea of how you finally came to the recognition that it was okay to not suffer in silence and what was that experience like and how did you overcome that?

Speaker 3: 23:07

Yeah, it wasn't easy. I was even ashamed to go speak to my local doctor. That's how bad it was. It was ingrained in me to show weakness, vulnerability to a doctor, a professional, but it really came back to. We've got to take action to try and heal ourselves.

Speaker 3: 23:30

Like you said, with the self-medication I was drinking, I was doing all my habits and my actions weren't always aligned with my values and the man I wanted to be. So I had to cut the vices you know no more, cut the v devices and really get on my purpose. I went and spoke to a local GP and I got on and I started speaking to somebody and I got somebody that you know and a lot of my stuff was around business and you know then working out my core values and that was a lot of the work that we did. So once we heal ourselves and we've really got to do the work of why am I doing what I do? Why am I going out partying every weekend? Why am I got this conflict where I'm not really alive with my core values, if I'm saying this is the man I want to be, but then I'm acting like a different person, there's obviously a disconnect here.

Speaker 1: 24:22

yeah, and getting.

Speaker 3: 24:24

And getting clear on what do I believe in as a man? What do I believe the purpose of life is? To be. See my purpose is. I believe my personal philosophy is it's the relentless pursuit to find one's greatness. Who can I actually become before my time is up? Yeah, I love that.

Speaker 1: 24:48

Go ahead, Marty.

Speaker 3: 24:50

Sorry, but yeah, my family, because I know for a fact when I'm not the best version of me, it affects my mom, it affects my friends, it affects everything. Because I'm not in check. Because once we work out what we believe the philosophy, our personal philosophy of life is, then we look at well, what behaviours and what values does this person show up as which really comes back? That's why, when you say core values, I just think it's so important, because then we can go and then we come back to our daily activities. Did I make decisions in alignment with my core values? Because if you did, that's a win, that's something to celebrate.

Speaker 1: 25:52

Absolutely, and I think it's so important. And I think for many of us we have an idea of what our core values are, but we don't really know what they are. But we don't really know what they are and so I don't know for you, but I found, any time that my buttons were being pushed, that it was probably a value, a core value that I had, that was being triggered. And then the assessment is that core value still serving me or not? Yes, because I'm sure you found in your journey let's talk a little bit about that that how much what core values were no longer serving you, that you felt that you needed to change, maybe not the entire core value, but the meaning, maybe around it needed to change or something needed to be different. So tell me a little bit about that journey for you.

Speaker 3: 26:45

Sure, and just to touch on one point, I never used to think core values were that important. And then when I started seeing a sports psychologist and I was paying them that's when I started One of the first things we did was the core values, and it comes back to the self-confidence of knowing who you are. So to anyone listening that thinks that maybe they're not self-confidence comes from the values of knowing who we are. I think maybe the values of this value of working hard and playing hard and I used to justify it to myself, that and it was also trying to please other people. This is the big thing. Once again to the core values is seeking validation from ourself, not from external things, not trying to do things because it looks cool on social media or because we think other people are going to like it.

Speaker 3: 27:35

For example, I'm not going to go out on a Friday night because my friends want me to and then I'm thinking it'll be good I might. I can get some cool photos for Instagram if I don't feel like going out on Friday night. I'm not going out because I don't want to Do. You know what I mean. I'm not like, I'm not. That can't be swayed. I want to get up early and I want to go train in the morning. I've got to go. Tomorrow I'm going to be building, working with Michael Casitas, so me going out tonight's not even an option. But in the past it was this influence from external people and this work hard, play hard lifestyle that look cool, and so it's really seeking validation from me. And what do I want? And making that and not doing anything, not to look cool, not to impress anyone. I'm doing things for my purpose and my values. I'm not going to say that if I still like going out, though, I might go out if I wanted to, but I don't.

Speaker 1: 28:34

Yeah absolutely and you hit a key piece. There were a couple of key pieces there. One is talking about doing things for others and then I'm doing it for myself and you tied that into the validation piece. And one thing I learned from listening to some of Larry Wagner or Wagner's work with the data edge and he talks about that's one of the core needs of men. That we need is validation.

Speaker 1: 28:57

We need to feel validated, we need to be feel respected and we need to, we need to feel like, appreciated. And so that's so interesting, because many of us do things for external purposes, thinking that's going to fill that void for us, but then it doesn't fill that void for us but then it doesn't. And the proliferation of social media and we're both in that sphere of the work that we're doing it's a necessary evil. I think we do a decent job of managing ourselves and being on that platform, because it can be extremely speaking, going back to mental health that social media has been such a detriment to society in that aspect. So what are your thoughts on that?

Speaker 3: 29:39

See, I use social media for purpose now. I don't use it to get sick validation. Obviously we want to put out good content that resonates with people. I'm talking about more. The 27-year-old version of Marty, now the 37-year-old the 27-, 27 year old was flexing this lifestyle of being this entrepreneur that had come from nothing can finally made it, which because I do like hip hop and how that's the music I like. But it was like posting things for like approval to portray this lifestyle. And I look back on and I'm like mate, that was just very egotistical, like there's nothing wrong with having a little bit of self-confidence.

Speaker 3: 30:19

And if you're looking good, post a photo. I'm not saying that I still do that. Be proud of who you are, absolutely. But coming back, you're posting a photo from because you want to post it. These are you're posting your story because you've got a message to share, because you want to post it. You're posting your story because you've got a message to share, because you want to serve others and it takes a lot of vulnerability to open up and talk about. But you're doing it because you know there's a lot of other men struggling and I can tell you this I've spoken with the governing bodies and mental health Black Dog Institute, lifeline Australia, lived Experience Mental Health. The root cause of this and this is the stigma that plagues mental wellbeing and men's mental health is we need strong men speaking up and showing a bit of vulnerability to show, hey, it's okay to go seek help. That is the root cause of a lot of the problems at the moment yeah, I completely agree.

Speaker 1: 31:19

I think more than more that you and I and others are doing this and speaking up and talking about this important issue is so needed today, and that we it gives validation to those men who are struggling, who maybe not have haven't heard it just right yet.

Speaker 1: 31:36

And so one of our voices will resonate with them, and that's why we need to do that. And so I'm glad we're coming back to mental health, because I want to talk a little bit about an old army mate you met in 2023 and how that experience really opened your eyes to the silent struggles that many men face, and how did that encounter really influence your approach to life and business.

Speaker 3: 31:59

Yeah, and there's another couple of stories that have come since this one. But to go to that story, so I played representative rugby with this guy. I was playing first grade rugby at the time and then I was playing also for North Queensland Army team and this guy's about 6'2", very broad, shout out Shane the very stocky, still a very kind of very intimidating looking guy and him and I clashed when we first met. We actually nearly got into a fight because we both just played with intensity and we ended up becoming really good mates because we're on the same team and we just went into battle with each other against the other team.

Speaker 3: 32:40

Long story short, he 14 years in the army, played a lot of sports and then he was a model for one of our photo shoots and everything seemed fine and we went out for dinner and I met his son and then about three weeks later he does this very big post on Facebook about just how much you're struggling because he'd been trying to get out of the army and he was injured and there was a lot of difficulties there and I don't know this for sure, but I think he was possibly having suicide ideation. And then he just said to me mate. We need to do more and that's how I've really started to go on this journey. And the more men since that day, the amount of strong men that have opened up to me in confidentiality has just been eye-opening. It's absolutely eye-opening. I'm talking former gang members. I'm talking professional world champion boxers, men that own cafes. I'm talking all walks of life. This affects from the toughest guys that have been to prison to the nicest guys that are doing their best running a cafe for their family.

Speaker 1: 33:53

That's incredible. I think it's the work you're doing. It's just, it's so needed and we're on opposite sides of this big piece of rock that we live on that we call earth, and I think the more that we do this work in helping men find a place to come to and now you're doing it you have a couple of different businesses and I always see you're wearing your Phoenix workwear stuff Talk a little bit about how the mission of that project and how it's serving the world today.

Speaker 3: 34:19

Yeah, a big part of our mission and it really comes back to my personal philosophy is I'm a big believer in resilience and overcoming the things that hold us back. It really comes from first. We've got to heal ourselves in terms of a lot of these. I'm not saying we're always fully healed or anything like that, but we've got to get to a really good place with our habits, our rituals, cut away to drinking. If you're drinking all the time, I'm not saying don't go out and have a couple of beers if that's your thing. I'm not like that. Do whatever works for you. But for me it was cutting away the alcohol and really overcoming these personal things that we've got. So, overcoming what holds us back. That's what my personal mission is now is to help particularly men, athletes is really overcome this self-confidence and then break the stigma around mental wellbeing. So it's really that's what our mission is around.

Speaker 3: 35:18

And I'm not saying people go post on Facebook all about mental health. I'm just talking about speak to someone that you can trust or go see your local GP. If you're struggling right now, go have a chat. In Australia. There's a thing called a free mental health care plan In Canada. I'm sure there's probably some good services there, or reach out to someone and just even just talking to someone you can trust that really listens, is a big help, like I spoke to one of my good mates the other day, and you just feel better after a great hope. But this needs to be somebody that you can trust and understand. That's the key thing.

Speaker 3: 35:59

Yeah, I completely agree, but yeah, and then, where I'm really with my work, that I'm really doing like what's become really clear for me is what I'm really passionate about. It's really I love these types of conversations. I just feel really I love speaking because I know what it feels like to be there as a man and when I with what we're working on with the Resilience Project, and to see these men some are athletes, some are not, some are everyday men who just lack the self-confidence and the self-belief to come to how to come back from a loss and adversity. I really feel like I can help there because I know what that's like and I really enjoy doing that at the moment.

Speaker 1: 36:42

I feel like, yeah, love that, just love that. There must have been through your journey. I think I'll make a paint, a pretty broad stripe here, but I think through your journey you probably have read a decent book or two. Something that really maybe resonated, still sits you with, sits with you today, or maybe there's something you're currently reading but I always like to find out my guess and what has, what author or book or anything that's sitting on your nightstand currently that's really impacting your life yeah, I always go back to the obstacles the way by ron holiday.

Speaker 3: 37:17

I don't know if you've read that, but yeah I just I read it when I was growing.

Speaker 3: 37:22

We're doing massive numbers. For us in business we're doing around 70 000 a day at the time and it was just chaotic and things just were going wrong and it really it really with stalls and like what I took from it is if we can embrace the fact because basically my whole world was crashing in at the time. It felt like in business and every morning I would get up at 5 am real early and I started reading obstacles the way and getting to stoicism and I'd read and I think, okay, if this was the last day that I was going to be alive, how would I am going to show up? And I started getting emotional. I'm like you know what I'm not going to quit because they're never, ever going to say that he gave up and that made. I'm going to show up every day, I'm going to turn this around for my mom. And.

Speaker 3: 38:15

And then I just wrote down the five things I could do to potentially solve the problem and I took action and it really reframed the way that I look at obstacles. We've got a choice where we can either let these adversity and let these obstacles define us and let us go. I'm not where I want to be, because this happened in my life. You can either use it as that point or you can go. You know what? Bring it on, I'm going to go through it, I'm going to go around it, but I'm going to let this make me become better. This is going to be part of my story of what I've overcome to inspire the next person, because that's who I am and what I'm built about. So it's a it's that reframe of how we view it 100.

Speaker 1: 39:03

It is, and that's why we started today's conversation, talking about how, when adversity comes into our life, it reveals the character of who we are as men, and the nice thing about that is that, while we may not always like what we see, we have an opportunity to change how it shows up the next time. And so you, you also started this conversation, and you mentioned a mentor, and so my question for you is what's been the best piece of advice you've been given, and how has it served you?

Speaker 3: 39:34

yeah, I'm gonna butcher the quote a little bit, but the first one that comes to the top of my head. It was actually so please forgive me, everyone that listens, but it was given by an American president, but it goes along the lines of persistence, it's the only thing. Money can't buy. It. It's one of these things. It's only over. You only fail once you decide to quit. Persistence can't be bought. It's this grit and I think, as men, if we've got this persistence as our core value, or this grit, if you make a decision that no matter how hard it gets, no matter what comes my way, I'm never going to quit. Hard it gets, no matter what comes my way, I'm never going to quit. And that's not to say you don't potentially keep going with a business if it's not working for you, but I mean for your personal philosophy of the man you want to be.

Speaker 1: 40:26

I love that. That's so true and resonates loudly for what I was dealing with today. So I appreciate that as a reminder, marty, of everything that we spoke about today. And maybe there was something we didn't get a chance to touch on what would be the one takeaway you'd want our listeners to have?

Speaker 3: 40:45

I want to touch back on that point about adversity and obstacles. Like I want to be clear that it sucks sometimes. I'm not really talking about losing someone you love or something like that. Like with my good friend, michael Casitas, the champion boxer. He lost his best friend and his brother who was a champion jockey, and it really derailed him and I know how hard that was for him and now he's really bouncing back.

Speaker 3: 41:11

But I think it comes back to is working out what type of man you want to be. Like deep in your soul, deep in your heart, who do you want to be? What's that vision? Is it somebody that? Who's that man that you can be proud of? And that is the main point, because there was a time in my life I used to look in a mirror and I didn't like what looked back at me. But now I can be here and I can speak on stage, I can do these things, I can run, and I'm not saying that to impress anyone. I'm showing that I've overcome.

Speaker 3: 41:44

There was a point in my time I didn't even like myself. I was lost, and I know this was when I was much younger. So if I can go there now and speak on stage. I never thought I could actually do that. There was so many limiting beliefs, so much lack of self-confidence to public the fact that I've overcome a lot of these things. I'm saying that because, whatever you feel like you're potentially going through, I assure you there is, if you want it bad enough and you build the habits and the vision of the man you want to be and never deter from that and just keep moving forward. I think you can't run and it's who we become in the process, like I'm more proud of me now, not because of my, the business or any of that. I'm proud of who I am. It's the person. And that's where you can. If you can look in the mirror at the end of the day and be proud of the man that you're going towards. That's the victory there. That's what we want to get to, I believe.

Speaker 1: 42:43

I completely agree. What a great way to sum up everything that we've talked about today. Just love that. I just want to say thanks once again, marty, for spending time with me today and showing us that really, the journey of self-discovery and of service, that we can overcome just about anything, and so it may not be easy, but it is possible, gentlemen. And so if men are interested in getting a hold of you, marty, and participating in your work, what's the best way for them to do that?

Speaker 3: 43:10

On Instagram. So it's just Marty underscore mate status or LinkedIn for Marty Cornish yeah, come hang out with me there and got some cool stuff coming and I'm all about building community. And, alan, thank you so much for having me, man. I really enjoyed the questions. You really asked some great questions and with what you're doing around the work and we're very aligned mate, so it's great work that you're doing. It really seems. Yeah, you're doing great work.

Speaker 1: 43:35

Thank you so much, brother, and have a great day. Thank you so much for being on the show.

Speaker 3: 43:39

Thanks brother.

Speaker 2: 43:46

Cheers. Thank you for listening to the Revolutionary man podcast. Are you ready to own your destiny, to become more the man you're destined to? The Revolutionary man podcast. Are you ready to own your destiny, to become more the man you are destined to be? Join the brotherhood that is the Awakened man at theawakendmannet and start forging a new destiny today.